The Head of My Enemy
The smell of sweat and fear consumed the air around her. She sat staring out into an open field, strewn with the bodies of her comrades and friends. They had gone in good faith, charging forward into the fight. FIlled with promises of greatness and triumph they boldly ran forward but were met with strength beyond what they expected. Quickly one by one they fell. As they met their challengers they became struck with fear. These were people of great stature, bold and filled with an anger that seemed to pulse through their veins. It was as though the anger had fed their every muscle fiber. It was devastating. By the end, she had fallen back and ended up back in the tent.
After a period of exhaustion and confusion, she awoke in a more clear state of mind. Looking around she realized the size of their army! There were men and women dressed in remarkable armor and of towering heights. All assembled and ready they stood in battalions prepared for what seemed like their entire purpose in life. Why had they not joined the fight? Why had companies of commoners swarmed the battlefield in total faith that this army would follow, only to be slaughtered out there left on their own? At this realization, she collapsed in anger and called out. Where was He? The one who had promised her triumph and support; her Father?
With a calm and steady pace, He approached her and she began yelling at him. Hitting him repeatedly and demanding answers. Blow after blow he took from her while she demanded answers about the scorns of people He had allowed to become victims in a hopeless battle. Where was his army when they needed them most? How could He have promised her protection and victory and then stood by and watched so many innocent people fall? When she had nearly reached the end and could yell no more she spat in his face and sent him away. “Traitor”, she thought.
As night fell the encampment fell quiet with the smell of campfire lingering about. Looking out of her tent she could see scattered campfires here and there with small groups gathered around. It struck her how lonely she had become after losing her comrades. In desperation, tears came to her face and she began sobbing. The saltiness of her tears began to touch her lips and her body became weak and trembled. This was hopeless. The enemy would surely advance in the early hours of the morning, through the thick fog, and without help, she would be captured. She had nowhere left to turn. In the quiet, and when she could cry no more, she turned and saw Him standing there.
With a humble demeanor, he crossed the room and sat beside her. As his eyes met hers she could see a visible pain and ache across His face. At that moment she broke, crumbling like hardened sand when it gets touched. At that moment He met her with kindness. He listened to her cry and spoke gentle affirmations to her pain. After a while, she found herself so exhausted she succumbed to her fate. She had given every ounce of fight she had left and could no longer try. As He listened to her cry, he covered her with a blanket and stayed while she slept. And slept she did.
She awoke to footsteps approaching and she bolted upright. Immediately she recognized the calmness of the camp and a sense of safety. She had not been captured? She had made it through the night, and by the looks of it well into the heat of the day. She gathered herself and with intrigue stepped out into the light.
The camp was a bustle with noise and movement. Soldiers going to and fro were covered in blood and dirt. Some stood cleaning their blades while others mended wounds. What had she missed? The spirit of triumph and celebration lingered in the air. As her eyes met each warrior they would nod their head as though she was deserving of some respect or valor. As her eyes scanned the camp she saw Him walking toward her. In his right hand, he carried the head of her enemy. In complete confusion and awe, she stood stunned as he reached her.
“Why? I don’t understand?” she said and he approached her. “My dear, we waited in the first battle for you to call us out.” He responded. In shock, she stared at the enemy’s head and then back up at Him. “When you saw us being slaughtered out there, wasn’t it obvious we needed help?!” she stammered back at him. She found herself feeling a rush of emotions; relief, anger, confusion, and gratitude.
For a moment there was silence, and then He spoke calmly saying “Of course, I could see that. In tears and heartache, I waited and waited for you to retreat and give me the order to advance. I cried out to you but you would not listen. As long as you continued fighting and didn’t give me the word, I could not help you. But here, I have returned and in your weakness, you have become triumphant! HERE, HERE! Celebrate with us, YOUR victory!” In disbelief, she stared back at him “MY victory?” “Yes, this is your victory. I called out for your enemy and returned with his head, my army is yours and I am your protector. We are proud to return from battle in your victory, my child!” As He said this he held up “the head” and the entire encampment chanted her name. A loud display of power and prowess.
It came over her at that moment, her pride and desperation had stepped into the way. It was because of her pride that her own people were slaughtered all while her Father’s army waited patiently for her to fall back and allow the battle to be won. She didn’t need to go charging out there when all along she had an army stronger than anyone else’s at her disposal. All that had been required was an act of humility, stepping back and surrendering her control to the army, and its Leader, who was capable of winning the battle for her. All she needed to do was rest patiently, in stillness. In that time of stillness, He claimed for her a victory beyond belief. The head of her enemy was taken into her hands and her triumph claimed. In her absolute desperation, she let go, and at that moment she had won. She was unstoppable. Now she realized, this was the army that would fight her battles for her. This was the way she would protect her people. In the stillness of her heart and the surrender of her battles, she would win the war.
